By popular demand – a digest of our ‘Relationship tips of the week’

quotesFor the past three months or so The Terrace has been sharing a ‘Relationship tip of the week’ on Facebook each Friday. Short sentences of supportive words to take into the weekend, they have proved very popular so we thought a digest of tips might be useful. Perhaps you have missed one or two, or are new to our Facebook page. Or maybe you are a fan and would like to see them all together for the first time….

So – here they are. Not all of them will have meaning for you, but something will resonate and we would love to know what your feelings are as you read them. Is there a topic you would like Jane to cover? Could they be shorter? Longer? Clearer? Would you like more than one a week?  Do comment below (or better still, ‘like’ our Facebook page to comment each week) and we will be certain to take everything you say into account as we continue to offer the words for the weekend, and for life.

‘Change takes time – change needs patience, care and attention.’

‘Constant joke making and laughing can deflect from saying what you think. Reflect – what is the function of making jokes all the time. What am I avoiding saying?’

‘Forming a shared dream is a relationship maker’

‘Do I look away when I am saying something which I find difficult? Check yourself out.’

‘Am I feeling gratitude for what I do have in my relationship? If not, think of 5 gratitudes. See what difference this makes.’

‘Less is more – going on and on does not work. Figure out what you would like to say, shave it down to one ‘digestible’ sentence, then say it.’

‘Speaking loudly does not get us heard. Speaking softly but clearly gives us a better chance of being heard.’

‘Being assertive is different from being aggressive. We need to be assertive to say what we believe in.’

‘People come together through their similarities, but they grow an intimate relationship through managing their differences.’

‘Taking your time is no sin! Reflective responses can hold true meaning.’

‘If I am not saying who I am, and what I stand for, then the other cannot know me…’

‘Communicating anger is well done when you are no longer feeling it. …’

‘Notice – am I listening? Or just formulating my response? Listen, receive the information, and then see how you would like to respond.’

‘What is important is what the other hears and takes in – not what you say. Check what they have heard. It may be different from what you intended to say….’

(From Jane Gotto, UKCP Reg Psychotherapist & Founder of The Terrace)

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